"Two Steps Forward and One Step Back"

Do you ever feel like just when you think you have everything under control you hit a tree? A gigantic 50 year old beautiful oak tree???  It's almost like you cant stand having peace and tranquility in your life and you just cant help yourself , so you have to fuck it all up? I believe this applies to most areas of our lives; parenting, jobs, relationships, bad habits etc...When Sydney was an infant (she was sooooo adorable :) I remember saying to my friend  "just when I think I have her on a set schedule she goes and changes on me!" The audacity!!!! :)  It's almost like the higher powers are testing you and/or have a cruel sense of humor! "Let's make everything great and then fuck it all up to see what she does! hehe! Does she really have it all together?" Well, I was tested this weekend and I got a big... FAIL! I thought to myself,  "well, two steps forward and one BIG ASS step back! Uggg..."

But, good news! Today is a  NEW day (Thank GOD) and you just have to keep moving, keep trying and the age old cliche: never give up...strong coffee and good friends help :) I said to Sydney this morning on our way to school, "Talk to me sugar plum" and she said, "I dont want to go to school".  I became a little concerned becasue she's NEVER said that to me before, I said,  "why not?" and she said, "because I want to go to work with you and sit with you and give you hugs all day". Now that just makes it ALL WORTH IT!
So, for her, for me and for those that feel my wrath when I fuck it all up...I'm giving it another shot today. So, here's to my two steps forward and another chance at getting it right...Peace.